Monday, January 05, 2009

Come on darling, do it for daddy...

Have a look at this rather depressing piece by Jeremy Vine from today's Mail. Note how it's impossible to read without hearing him doing his "and now a, pause, SERIOUS voice" in your head. When you've got that out of your system, go back and look at the pictures.

There's a whole hidden industry in these. Go to any stock picture library and bash a phrase like "child abuse" into the search box (I don't advise doing this anywhere other than a stock picture library - the police don't look kindly on the Pete Townshend defence). You'll find snap after snap of children cowering wretchedly, squatting in nightwear, clutching tattered teddy bears or displaying their tear-stains in NSPCC-standard black and white, every single one of them marked "Model Released" and ready to be slotted neatly into whatever context complete strangers might have in mind for them. And in every case, there was a parent or guardian standing somewhere behind the camera saying "that's it darling! You're doing really well! Now pretend a nasty man's been touching you down there!"

Bearing in mind that this is about four hundred rungs beneath skipping about and grinning gap-toothedly on Britain's Got Talent or trying out for Tiny Tot 2 in Werthers Original: The Revenge, just what the hell sort of a pushy stage-school parent puts their kids through this? And how many trips to Disneyland do you think it takes before their consciences are salved?

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi Adam

would love to yak with you about this one day, drop us a line when you have a min?! Liz

Anonymous said...

I suppose it's inevitable that the Mail would choose a picture that featured thugs wearing "Hoodies".

Louis Barfe said...

I'm hearing it in a specific sort of 'serious voice'. The "let's call her Sarah" reeks of Simon Bates doing Our Tune.