I'm a big fan of the new 3am "girls" in the Mirror, with their incredibly honest strapline (if by "gone toxic" they mean "gone off, past its sell-by date").

Any column that on only its third day in existence (second, if you discount the one they devoted to showing us snaps from their family albums and proving that non-celebs can look shiny and careworn in photos too) can pull in two exclusives like "Justin Timberlake has cup of tea in same place as Boris Johnson, we manage to speak to neither of them" and "Kylie goes to Paris, refuses to speak to us so we don't really know what's going on in these photos" is a veritable scoop factory. You go, "girls"!